Sue’s story – supported by Phyllis Tuckwell

Sue had been nursing her mum Beatrice for five years when things finally got too much for her.

“Mum had breast cancer, dementia and osteoporosis,” says Sue. “She couldn’t walk on her own, so I had to carry her from the bedroom to the bathroom. There comes a point when you can’t do it on your own anymore.”

Beatrice was referred to PTHC and cared for by our Hospice Care at Home nurses, who visit patients who have chosen to remain at home in their last weeks of life.

“Mum wanted to stay at home,” says Sue, “and because of Phyllis Tuckwell she could. When the door went, we used to say ‘our angels are here’. They loved coming to see her. There was a nurse called Pat and she always had cold hands. Mum would say to her ‘You’ve got cold hands!’, and Pat would call out to me ‘Sue, I’m getting told off again!’ They treated Mum like one of their own, and they did the same to me. They took all my concerns away.”

“Before they started coming I used to get a heavy feeling in my chest. But once they started visiting, I didn’t have that feeling. They gave me back the quality of time with my mum that I needed. They took all the pressure away, so I could feed Mum, and sit and have a cup of tea with her. I always thought I could cope on my own, but I realised I couldn’t do it without their help.”

“On the morning that Mum died, the nurses came as usual. I remember hearing them laughing with her. Within two hours of them leaving, she had died. I phoned them and they came straight back. They sorted Mum out and stayed with me for quite a long time. There was no rushing; they made sure that I was ok before they left.”

“When the doctor first came out to see us, I thought Mum only had a couple of weeks left, but she went on for another eight weeks. I put that down to the care those nurses gave her, that I got those extra weeks with her. They were also there for me.”